So what happens to your relationship once you have a baby? Most young parents say the same thing – if before you could spend the entire Sunday in bed indulging in each other’s company, well apparently after the baby everything changes. It’s no longer about you, it’s no longer about sex and it’s no longer about looking good and staying fit. But there has got to be a way to trick this “natural progression”, which may seem inevitable at first.
So I decided to ask around and feature each month a new mom of the month who appears to be ahead of the game and find out how she does it. Introducing this month’s Hot Mama of the Month Victoria and her interview below:
Q How long have you been in your current relationship and how old is your baby/kids?
A I have been in a relationship for 4 years and the kids are 1.5 son and 2.5 daughter
Q What is your profession and do you work?
A Yes I work as real estate agent
Q Are you happy with how you look? Is there before and after baby difference?
A Yes, I am actually very happy with my look, and not much before and after baby difference. I gained 22 kilos but lost it all. I find that there is more motivation for me to look better after having kids and for me the reason for that is that you want to look like your friends that don’t have kids. When i tell people that l have two kids and they go: “Noway!” it makes me feel amazing.
Q What makes you feel the sexiest? As in what kind of rituals do you have for looking and feeling good that you absolutely cannot live without?
A I really love to be wearing a bathing suit! I feel sexy also when I walk around at home in nice lingerie. To feel good and relaxed a spa day is a must every two weeks, even once a week! Pedicure and manicure must be done no matter what, even if it is the end of the world I still gotta have it done! Massage is the best relaxation, after a hard day of working and kids. So my three musts for feeling sexy are: nails have to be nice, hair done and skin must be healthy.
Q What is your motivation to make an effort to look good? You are married, may as well stop trying?
A Oh no, noway!! Disagree. My husband is very handsome, so I have to try a LOT harder for him. So never ever stop looking good is my motto! Yes, things are different after marriage, but you still have to make an effort to look your best all the time, so he doesn’t even get any second thoughts. I always want to be the most beautiful wife for him and the sexiest woman for my husband and remain be his fantasy girl.
Q What is your weekly workout routine?
A I workout three times a week. I do kickboxing class and an aerobics classes with elements of kick boxing. It is hardcore cardio and you sweat big time. I also walk about 10 km a day with my kids, so about 2.5 hours every day, because funny enough my little one sleeps best when he is outside. Before I used to walk every day and now that i went back to work i try to still do it when i have time…
Q Do you find your sexual appetite has changed after giving birth?
A No it hasn’t changed at all. The time is a luxury now however, not enough time in a day to do everything! If I had more time, I would do it more often. I believe for a healthy relationship you need to have sex once a day.
Q How do you de-stress and get into the mood?
A I like to go out with friends, talk, have some wine. To get into the mood I like to dress up for him in lingerie and costumes. I find when you do that it makes you feel like you are dating and adds some spice to the relationship. Plus now that we have kids, there is always that element of getting caught and time sensitivity which makes it kind of fun in a way, like we have to hide and rush.
Q What was the most pleasant surprise he ever came home to?
A Like I said, I like to play games and dress up – that always get his attention. We do this so often I cannot think of just one surprise. Also a combination of dressing up and making dinner for him always makes him happy.
Q In your opinion, what are some Don’ts in a relationship that kill passion? For example, some believe that each partner must ideally have their own bathroom and what happens in there should always be a mystery.
A I agree that what happens in the bathroom should be a secret. Another thing is: don’t complain and nag all the time, don’t be always angry or upset, be a happy person. He wants to be with a happy and easy going woman. Having a lot of hobbies in common that you both enjoy is important; having fun together makes your relationship stronger